


To Repent My Wicked Deeds

by CrystalQueer



Category: OMORI (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Attempted Murder, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, Forgiveness, Friendship, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Injury Recovery, Mari Lives AU, Medical Inaccuracies, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Selectively Mute Sunny, technically, that should cover everything TBH, we will see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 21:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29070927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalQueer/pseuds/CrystalQueer
Summary: He broke the violin. Pitched it down the stairs to feel a brief sense of satisfaction as it smashed against the ground, the sheet music settling over it like snow drifting to the ground. He immediately regretted it.Mari, getting ready in their room, came rushing out at the noise, and when she saw the mess, she began to yell. Sunny was frightened, Mari had never yelled at him before, but he argued back. He couldn’t yell, but he made his frustration known.They both said things that they would regret. And Sunny, signing as he spoke as was his habit, used his hands to send a message.Mari fell down the stairs.
Comments: 65
Kudos: 585





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from I Ain't Done by The Crane Wives.
> 
> I haven't written in awhile, so I'm sorry if this is a bit clunky, but I really love Omori and this is how I'm coping with it.
> 
> Special thanks to my friend [Polandspringz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for not only letting me use her DMs to plot all this out, and offering input, but also betaing this so it isn't a complete mess.
> 
> Please leave a comment if you enjoy, ty! <3

It all happened so fast.

He had grown to resent his violin, grown to dread each lesson for it dragged him away from his friends. While they got to watch cartoons in the mornings, got to play together and have fun, he was shut away. Practicing. But he never said anything, never complained; they had worked so hard to come together and buy the violin, he didn’t want to give up and disappoint them.

This recital was the height of his stress and resentment. It required more time spent practicing which in turn meant Sunny spent less time with his friends, and it scared him, the thought of performing for everyone he knew. Even with Mari at his side, he was terrified. Terrified of the stage, of the pressure, of failing-

He broke the violin. Pitched it down the stairs to feel a brief sense of satisfaction as it smashed against the ground, the sheet music settling over it like snow drifting to the ground. He immediately regretted it.

Mari, getting ready in their room, came rushing out at the noise, and when she saw the mess, she began to yell. Sunny was frightened, Mari had _never_ yelled at him before, but he argued back. He couldn’t yell, but he made his frustration known.

They both said things that they would regret. And Sunny, signing as he spoke as was his habit, used his hands to send a message. Mari fell down the stairs.

She shrieked as she fell and each thump as she rolled down the stairs echoed through the house and in Sunny’s ears as he stood, frozen, and could only watch her fall with wide and terrified eyes. She landed on the broken remains of the violins, and was still.

Basil, who must have come in unnoticed during the argument and now stood stock-still in the doorway, screamed. Snapping Sunny out of his fog enough for him to realize just what he had done.

“Mari?” Sunny asked, voice tentative and hoarse as he began to slowly creep down the stairs after her, clinging to the banister like he couldn't stay upright without it. “Mari?” His voice grew more frantic.

“Mari!” Basil was already half-crouched over her body and looked frantically between her and her brother. “Sunny- you pushed- no you wouldn’t- she-” His breath came in ragged pants and he looked as terrified as Sunny felt.

Sunny reached the base of the stairs and fell to his knees next to Mari, hands shaking as they fluttered over her body like he could help her in some way. He was crying, he thought, he could feel the tears on his face. Basil was speaking, muttering incoherently to himself as much as Sunny. Sunny could barely hear him.

“Mari.” He whispered, voice choking.

“Sunny, what did you do?” Basil asked in a horrified whisper.

Sunny looked up to him, face crumpled. “I… pushed… Her.”

“No, no, you wouldn’t right? You wouldn’t… It’s Mari. It was an accident, right Sunny? An accident?” Basil sounded even more frantic now as he dug his fingers into his thighs. “We.. we need to fix this, Sunny. We need-”

“Help.” Sunny choked. “ _Help_.”

“No! Sunny! No! You’ll- you’ll get in trouble! They- they- they won’t… understand, they’ll- you’ll get in trouble! She- she might be-”

“Get help.” Sunny insisted, staring at Basil. He.. He couldn’t, he couldn’t talk, couldn’t do anything, didn’t know what to do. He needed help. Mari needed help. Basil could help! Why wasn’t he helping?

“No!” Basil repeated. “We- we can’t- we… We’ll- you’ll get in trouble. But it wasn’t you, Sunny, was it? Right? It was an accident.. An accident…”

Sunny stared at Basil, his throat tight and his limbs heavy with panic. Why wouldn’t Basil get help? “Basil.. _Help_.”

“No, no, no, no- we can… Hide her. It. Maybe? Make it… Make it look different? We need to hide this Sunny, so you- we- you don’t get in trouble… They’ll be so angry..” Basil stood slowly. “I-I can, I can help! We’ll figure this out, th-they’ll never know-”

“No!” Sunny cried. “Get.. help. For Mari.”

“She’s dead!” Basil said. “We- we can’t help her! W-we need to hi-hide her! Hide this! Or you’ll get in trouble! Everyone… Oh they’ll all be so mad… and-”

“No!”

Basil began to stand, backing away without taking his eyes off the siblings, his hand fluttered nervously but he didn’t do anything. “I- I- I- I can’t- I just want to- if you won’t-” He couldn’t talk, his voice rose in pitch as he tried. “I’m sorry! I can’t-” Basil turned on his heel, and fled.

Sunny stared after him with shock. Why did he leave? Why, why did he want to.. _Not_ help Mari? What was Sunny supposed to do now?

“Mari?” He whispered desperately. She did not respond.

He could not tell if she was breathing.

He picked Mari up under her arms.

And slowly. Carefully. Dragged her upstairs.

Wincing each time she bumped against something.

He tucked her into her bed. She ought to be comfortable.

He sobbed. And tried to ignore the blood staining his hands. Crusting over his fingers. Sticking to his face as he wiped away tears. He didn't know what to do. But he remembered the violin.

Slowly, Sunny got to his feet and went downstairs once more. He knelt at the edge of the puddle of blood, and piece by broken piece gathered the violin into his arms, ignoring the splinters that dug into his skin. He made sure he picked up even the bits that had been dragged partway up the stairs when he moved Mari, and once he had everything, he knew he had to hide it all.

Numbly, he went to the playroom that had gone unused since the building of the treehouse, remembering the toy chest as a good place to hide things.

The phone began to ring.

And ring.

And ring.

Sunny locked the toy chest.

The ringing stopped.

He went to the phone. And called his mom.

She answered immediately. She must have been the one calling. “Hi honey, how are you? Excited for your big recital tonight? I just called but I figured you and Mari were practicing.”

“Mari.” Sunny choked out. “Fell. Help.”

The lie made his throat tighten even more, but Basil had been right about one thing, that he’d be in trouble for hurting Mari. And he was too scared to fathom the consequences of his actions. “ _Help_.”

He hung up.

* * *

His parents arrived home in record time with the paramedics hot on their heels. Sunny was sitting on the doorstep, the front door opened behind him, but only really acted when his parents rushed him and demanded to know where Mari was, and what had happened. Shaking, he led them to the staircase but refused to go any further past the pool of blood and broken violin.

“Room.” He whispered to his parents, pointing upstairs. They took the charge and led the paramedics along.

He heard his mother's surprised cry turn into a choked sob as she entered the room. Heard the paramedics talking, heard the sirens. But he stood still, numb.

His mother came back downstairs and guided him to the living room. He sat on the couch. A stretcher was brought in. His father paced the living room. One paramedic came to question Sunny, asked him what had happened, but Sunny couldn't even force himself to respond.

“He can’t talk, he... usually he can whisper to me, or to Mari, but she…” His mother's explanation was cut off with a sob. “Please, Sunny, what happened?”

Sunny forced his numb, shaking hands to cooperate and managed to sign one thing. _Fall_.

All his friends arrived just in time to see the ambulance leave with Mari. Sunny sat in the living room, a heavy blanket over his shoulders, but his parents were out on the front step. They were quick to send the kids inside and corner Kel and Hero's parents. The kids did not know what happened and asked Sunny questions, but he was unresponsive. All of their words sounded muted. Like he wasn’t really there to hear them.

Their parents all entered the room minutes later, faces drawn. Everyone turned on them immediately.

“What’s going on?” Kel demanded.

“Where’s Mari?” Aubrey tacked on. “And what’s wrong with Sunny?”

Sunny’s parents exchanged a look. His dad sighed heavily, and his mom looked like she was going to start crying again.

“Mari… Was in an accident. She.. fell down the stairs.” His dad explained slowly.

Everyone froze. Kel gasped, and Aubrey turned to Sunny, looking concerned. He did not meet her gaze.

“Did you..?” She began.

“He saw it happen. We think.” Sunny’s mom said. “He won’t talk right now, we... don’t know exactly what happened. But he tried to help Mari, and… he did get help.”

“Is Mari okay?” Hero asked, sounding stressed.

“We don’t know yet.”

“What about the recital?” Kel asked.

“It’s cancelled, obviously!” Aubrey snapped at him.

Kel shrunk away from her, hurt.

She frowned. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“All of you are going to have a sleepover next door, and we’ll call Basil’s parents to let them know what happened. Then Sunny’s dad and I are going to go visit Mari in the hospital.” Sunny’s mom continued, and turning to Sunny, she asked, “is that okay, honey?”

Sunny did not respond.

“We’ll bring a bag over for you, and call when we learn anything.”

Sunny continued to stare blankly.

Kel and Hero’s parents began to herd the children outside to break off any remaining questions they might ask, but when Sunny didn’t move to follow them, Hero doubled back and picked him up to carry him next door.

True to their word, Sunny’s parents stopped by Kel’s house before they left for the hospital to leave an overnight bag and say goodbye. He stood stiffly as they hugged him and kissed him and reminded him they loved him.

They wouldn’t love him if they knew the truth.

* * *

Sunny didn't eat when Kel and Hero's parents ordered pizzas, and sat silently on the couch when they all watched a movie. He couldn't fall asleep that night after everyone else had. Mari's shriek echoed in his ears and every time he tried to close his eyes, all that he could see was her body.

The call came late that night, after the adults had gone to bed. Hero, as restless as Sunny apparently, answered the phone instead. Sunny could hear him talking in hushed tones in the kitchen, but moments later he came to get him.

“It's your parents.” Hero said. “And about Mari.”

Sunny followed him to the phone. Accepted it as it was offered to him.

His mom was on the other end. “Sunny? Honey, I have good news. Mari- Mari's gonna be okay.” Her voice shook with relief as she spoke. “She- her neck is fractured, and one of her arms is broken, and the doctor is keeping an eye on her for signs of a head injury but.. She woke up briefly, and she's in stable condition. She's going to be okay.”

Sunny made a small noise into the receiver if only to show that he was listening.

“We'll talk to Kel's parents about it, but, you kids can come visit Mari in the hospital tomorrow, okay?” She paused, letting out a shaky sigh. “I-I'll let you get back to sleep now, I just wanted to let you know that she's okay. Good night, honey, I love you.”

 _I love you, too_. Sunny wanted to say. But the phone beeped as his mom hung up.

He put the phone back on the cradle and slid to the floor, sobbing with relief.

Mari wasn't dead. He hadn't killed his sister. She was going to be okay.

Hero, still nearby, joined Sunny on the floor as if to offer some silent support. Sunny did not think he deserved it, as cold dread began to seep in around his relief.

Mari was okay. 

But... What if she remembered the truth?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some good news, and a hospital visit.

Sunny didn’t sleep at all that night; every time he managed to doze off he would jolt awake moments later. He stared at the static on the tv, listened to his friends’ peaceful breathing, and the process repeated several more times. He must have fallen asleep eventually because the next thing he knew, he was waking up to Aubrey kicking Kel.

“Wake up!” Aubrey demanded. “Kel! Come on!”

Kel grunted and rolled over. It was difficult to tell if he was ignoring her, or genuinely still sleeping. Aubrey must have noticed Sunny staring, because she was quick to sidle up to him and sling an arm around his shoulders.

“Fine! If you won’t wake up, then Sunny and I will eat _all_ of the pancakes Hero made!” She threatened Kel.

Kel sat bolt upright. “There are pancakes!? Why didn’t you say so?” The rough sleep in his voice hardly masked his enthusiasm, and he was quick to jump on his feet and bolt off to the kitchen.

Aubrey rolled her eyes, but her expression was fond as she turned to look at Sunny. He stared back at her blankly.

“Sorry for waking you up.” She apologized after a moment, expression fading. “Hero said we should let you sleep, but Kel wouldn’t get up…”

Sunny didn’t respond.

“Hero made pancakes.” Aubrey offered. “You didn’t eat dinner, so you ought to eat breakfast since you’re up. Come on!”

She hopped to her feet and pulled Sunny out of his tangle of blankets and up along with her. The air outside of his blankets was cold, and he wanted nothing more than to curl back up and go back to sleep, but he allowed Aubrey to guide him to the kitchen anyway.

He didn’t deserve sleep.

Hero was at the stove making pancakes with one hand and trying to fend Kel off with the other, but he managed to shoot a smile and a “good morning!” to Sunny and Aubrey as Aubrey led him in. This was a morning like any other, a common occurrence during their sleepovers, but Mari and Basil’s absences weighed heavily in the room. Normally, Basil would be attempting to distract Kel at least long enough for Hero to finish cooking, and Mari would be at the fridge taking everyone’s drink orders.

It was weird without them.

Everyone seemed performatively happy, and it did little to mask the anxiety in the room, like they all noticed the absences of their friends and were trying to pretend it was all normal, at least for awhile. If Sunny did not know the horrible truth, he would expect to return home to Mari, happy to see him and asking how the sleepover went.

Finally, breakfast was served and everyone got their share. Sunny got himself a single pancake. When everyone sat down in the dining room to eat, he barely picked at his food.

They kept up a terse conversation and kept trying to engage Sunny, cracking jokes about the movie they had watched last night, acting still as if everything was _fine_ when it wasn’t, but when Sunny didn’t respond, they moved on.

Sunny could only stare at his hands in his lap. With them, he had hurt Mari. Ever since he was little, using his hands to sign had been his main method of communication. Signing to Mari, even while arguing, that was _normal_ up until he… He pushed her. His hands were dangerous. _He_ was dangerous.

If he were capable of hurting _Mari_ , then who was to say he wouldn’t hurt his friends?

It would be better if he stopped using his hands entirely.

That way, he couldn’t hurt anyone else.

A glass of orange juice was placed in front of him, drawing him out of his thoughts and his eyes up to Hero’s face, smiling, yet worried.

“If you won’t eat,” Hero said. “You should at least have _something_.”

Sunny drank the orange juice, if only so everyone would stop staring at him.

It made him feel nauseated.

“Good morning kids!” Kel’s mom said as sailed into the dining room.

“Good morning!” All the kids, except Sunny, echoed back.

Her gaze settled on Sunny for a moment, her eyes concerned, but she turned her focus away after a moment. “I have good news for you-”

“Is it about Mari!?” Kel asked.

“Don’t interrupt. But yes, it is.”

Everyone leaned forward in their seats.

“Sunny’s parents called this morning. Mari is okay! She’s injured, but she’s going to be fine.” The news was met with a loud cheer from Kel and Aubrey, and a sigh of relief from Hero. Sunny knew the news already, and didn’t react except to stare down at his hands again.

“They said that we could come and visit her, so after you’ve cleaned all this up and gotten dressed, we can go to the hospital. But all the dishes need to be washed first.”

Another cheer. Sunny had never seen Kel so excited to wash dishes before in his life.

Working together, everyone, except for Sunny, made quick work of the mess in the kitchen. The mood had changed exceptionally and now they were all genuinely excited, bouncing on their feet and rushing around to get ready to leave as fast as possible, yet Sunny felt like he was swimming in molasses, each of his actions slow and disconnected.

After a while, everything was done and everyone was ready, so they all piled into the car to go and visit Mari.

* * *

He had always hated the hospital.

It smelled too clean, and everything was bright and cold. People were supposed to recover here, but he couldn't imagine _anyone_ feeling better in a place like this. He couldn't imagine _Mari_ recovering here. He wanted her to be somewhere nicer, more cozy and comforting.

It was his fault she was here.

The nurse at the reception desk told them where to find Mari's room, and the group set off, bubbling with excitement only muted by the somber surroundings. Maybe Sunny wasn't the only one to find hospitals oppressing.

He trailed behind the group, listening to but not truly hearing their conversation as he walked…

...and walked…

...and walked…

The hallway stretched on endlessly, the glaring white lights reflected off the linoleum tiles and white walls, heart rate monitors beeped from every other room, and suddenly, he was alone. Walking. Walking where? All the rooms looked the same.

Sunny began to panic-

Only to come to an abrupt halt as he walked into Hero's back.

Why had they stopped?

Where had they gone?

They were outside Mari’s room. Everyone was staring at him. Were they expecting something? Sunny stared back blankly.

“Are… you gonna open the door?” Aubrey finally asked.

Sunny blinked. He stepped forward. And opened the door.

Sunny's parents, sitting in uncomfortable looking hospital armchairs and talking quietly, looked up as they entered. Mari was asleep on the hospital bed, surrounded by medical machines Sunny did not recognize. On the little tv mounted on the wall opposite of Mari, a talk show droned on. Mari would've hated that.

His mom smiled at him widely, but although he tried, Sunny couldn't return the expression.

Kel's parents went to Sunny's parents to talk. The kids all gathered around Mari's bed, Sunny swept along with them.

“Is she in a coma?” Aubrey asked Sunny's parents, eyes wide.

“No. She's just asleep, which means all of you will need to be quiet.” Sunny's mom explained.

“You hear that, Kel?” Aubrey asked. “You need to be quiet.”

“I can be quiet!” Kel replied, loudly.

Everyone stared at him. Aubrey crossed her arms. Hero chuckled.

“I can be quiet..” Kel repeated, softly, this time, as he turned his gaze to the floor.

Sunny ignored his friends, letting their conversation mix with the droning of the talk show on the tv, and stared at Mari's face.

And stared.

And stared.

Until he was no longer staring at Mari, peacefully asleep in her hospital bed, her neck in a brace and her arm in a cast and all of her cuts stitched and bandaged, but was instead staring at Mari, limp and bloody and unresponsive, lying in a slow growing pool of blood. _Her_ blood.

He felt panic. He could hear himself speaking, _pleading_ , but couldn't make out his own words. He raised his hands-

But he knew it wasn't to help her.

Kel jostled him, and he blinked in surprise, once again staring at Mari in her hospital bed. His hands were at his sides, and the room was swaying around him- or maybe he was swaying.

“Maybe we should give Sunny a minute alone?” Hero suggested.

Sunny could feel everyone staring at him as they murmured their agreement and began to shuffle out.

 _No!_ Sunny wanted to yell. _That's the last thing I want!_

But he couldn't find the words.

His dad squeezed his shoulder as he walked by.

To be left alone with Mari terrified him, and he could already feel his heartbeat growing faster as he stared at her. What if he hurt her again?

He took a step away from her bed.

And another, just to be safe.

Mari shifted, startling him, but she didn't wake up and he hated how relieved that made him feel.

After a few minutes, or maybe more, his mom reentered the room. She gave Mari a worried look, and her worry only grew when she looked at Sunny.

Her voice was soft when she spoke. “Hey, honey, are you ready to go? Your dad and I are going to head home for a bit, and you can come with us.”

Sunny dragged his gaze away from Mari, and stared at his mom instead.

“Aubrey is going to ride home with Kel and Hero, but I'm sure you'll see them all again later.”

A slow nod.

“Are you coming?”

He stared at her a moment longer, then turned to look at the tv. Stiffly, he raised an arm to point at it.

His mom frowned. “The tv? What about… Do you want the channel changed?”

Another slow nod.

Seeming to understand what he wanted, his mom found the remote and flipped through the limited channels.

Only once they found a movie that Mari would've liked did Sunny agree to leave.

* * *

When they got home, Sunny went straight up to his bedroom to lay down. Stepping over the now dried blood puddle at the base of the stairs, and carefully dodging every bloodstain on the floor.

He opened the door to the bedroom, and his gaze landed on Mari's bed. The sheets were rumpled and vaguely bloody, and painfully void of _Mari_ . Mewo, Mari's cat, was on Mari's bed, and stared at Sunny.

Sunny decided he couldn't stay in here. He would only be able to imagine what he had thought to be Mari's corpse tucked into her bed.

He pulled the blankets off of his own bed, and dragged them to the playroom instead. Without bothering to turn on the lights, he made a nest and curled up, right next to the toy box where he had hidden the violin.

In his head, violin music played a song of guilt that continued even after he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back for chapter two! Things get a little weird for Sunny, and they are only going to get worse. :)
> 
> I don't have too much to say for this chapter, actually! It's fun, and I like how I wrote Sunny dissociating, but my favourite chapter is chapter three and I'm very excited to share that.
> 
> Once again, special thanks to [Poland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for everything! Betaing this chapter, supplying me with ideas, and helping me keep on track when I started to get stressed about my writing.
> 
> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed this chapter, please consider leaving a comment! Ty <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another hospital visit.

For two days, Sunny turned away any guests who came to his doorstep. His dad went back to work, and his mom split his time between home and the hospital. Mari was awake more and more often, and his mom said she wanted to see him, but he wouldn’t leave to visit her, nor would he meet his friends when they came to visit.

He was afraid that if they came here, he’d hurt them.

They assumed he was just worried and upset about Mari. They didn’t know about the guilt that plagued him, and the phantom violin music that played in his head. He had to move out of the playroom. The violin music was too loud in there, and his mother washed Mari’s sheets. He was back in his room, laying in bed, staring at the ceiling.

Unable to hurt anyone.

But by the third day his friends would no longer take no for an answer.

“SUNNY, GET UP!” Kel yelled, bursting into the bedroom as he had done a thousand times before. Aubrey came bouncing in after him, and Hero brought up the rear, looking amused.

Usually, Mari would be in there too, and she’d gently scold Kel for the door, telling him to be careful, and Basil…

‘We’re going to check on Basil!” Kel announced as he jumped onto Sunny’s bed.

Sunny sat bolt upright, almost knocking heads with Kel.  _ No _ he wanted to say. He did not want to see Basil, did not want to be reminded of what Basil knew, and what Basil didn’t do.

“ _ And then _ we’re gonna make cards for Mari!” Aubrey added. “Her room was  _ so _ empty, she must hate it.”

“And we’ll try to deliver them ourselves.” Hero finished.

So it seemed the itinerary for the day was final. But Sunny didn’t want to do any of that.

Aubrey and Kel both grabbed an arm, as if they had planned this, and tried to drag Sunny out of bed, but he jerked away from them, startled, and wrapped his arms around his chest. He was afraid that he’d hurt either of them, and he could feel his heart rate raising. 

But he wanted to treasure what little time he had with them before they  _ knew _ and they  _ hated him _ . He had to act normal. He..

He got out of bed.

“Come on!” Kel was practically bouncing in place.

Sunny stared at him for a moment, then slowly raised one arm, and pointed.

“What are you..? Oh, the closet.” Hero said. “Do you… want something?”

A nod.

“I think he wants to get dressed!” Aubrey said. Sunny nodded again.

“Oh, okay! We’ll wait for you in the living room, join us when you’re ready!”

Sunny was not sure he would ever be ready to see Basil again, but he nodded once more and went to get dressed as soon as all of his friends left and closed the door. He was slow and unsteady, wanting to delay the inevitable, but getting dressed took only a few minutes, and soon he was reaching for the handle of his bedroom door.

Going down the stairs was a challenge. The blood had long since been scrubbed away, but he could still see the red edges of it on the wood floor. He could still see Mari there, limp, broken-

He jumped off the last step, over the imaginary blood puddle, socked feet making no noise but causing him to slip a little. He did not fall.

As promised, all of his friends were in the living room and talking to his mom about Mari, about visiting her to bring the cards they intended to make. He entered quietly so he wouldn’t disrupt them, but that didn’t work because Kel was on his feet as soon as he saw Sunny, and drew everyone’s attention to him.

Sunny waved.

“Finally!” Kel exclaimed. “Let’s go! We got lots to do today, and Mom wants Hero and I back in time for dinner!”

“Sunny, you’re going out?” His mom asked, sounding surprised. He didn’t blame her. He hadn’t been outside in a few days. “Be safe, honey. Okay? I love you.”

Sunny gave her the barest hint of a smile, and even twitched his fingers like he wanted to sign, but he thought better of himself and kept his hands at his sides. It was better if he didn’t use them. Who knew, maybe he would even hurt his mom if he tried to use his hands.

With Kel leading the charge, the group headed out to go and visit Basil. The sunlight was blinding, and Sunny had to pause for a moment to let his eyes adjust to the natural light of the world before he was able to follow his friends.

“He’s been like you.” Aubrey explained. “Ever since he heard the news, he’s been in his house. But we’re not just gonna let him  _ stay _ in there! Basil needs us!”

“It was Hero’s idea to check on him! We haven’t heard from him since… Y’know.” Kel added. “We’re not even really sure he knows she’s okay? Has your mom called Polly recently to tell her?”

Sunny shrugged slightly.

His friends seemed happy that he was more responsive than he had been. And, admittedly it did feel nice to interact with them, but he was still afraid of signing, afraid that one of them might end up in the road as creeping thoughts made him think about how  _ close _ it was and how  _ easy _ it would be, and he was already awful-

“Kel, watch where you’re going!” Aubrey shoved Kel after he bumped into her, and Kel shoved her in retaliation. Sunny winced and eyed the road even though neither were in danger.

As if sharing his thoughts, Hero looked over at the two. “Hey, be careful.” He said.

“Okay  _ mom _ .” Kel replied, sticking his tongue out.

Aubrey laughed.

* * *

They, or rather, Aubrey and Kel, had decided that Hero would be the one to do the talking. Kel insisted that Aubrey was “too mean”, and Aubrey insisted that Kel was “too obnoxious” and they all knew that Sunny wouldn’t be able to talk at all.

Kel did suggest letting Sunny talk to Basil, because Basil seemed to like Sunny the most, but Sunny shook his head and shrugged because he  _ couldn’t _ talk, and he did not want to talk to Basil.

The last time he did, Basil did  _ nothing _ .

Hero knocked on the door. Minutes later, Polly answered.

“Hello, kids!” She greeted with a smile. “Are you here to see Basil?”   
  
“Of course!” Kel answered, without actually letting Hero talk. Aubrey elbowed him.

“Oh, good.” Polly said. “He hasn’t really been out of his room since he heard about Mari.. Sunny, I’m so sorry about what happened to her.”

Sunny shifted his gaze to his feet.

“Did you guys hear that she’s okay? Does Basil know?” Hero asked.

“I did tell him. It was through his bedroom door, though, so I’m not sure that he heard.”

“Can we go see him?” Aubrey asked.

“You all know where his room is,” Polly said, stepping aside to let them in. “But I’m not sure he’ll come out… He… He hasn’t taken Mari’s hospitalization very well.”

“Sunny shut himself in for the past few days too, but as you can see, we are  _ very _ convincing!” Kel said, confidently marching inside with the others on his heels.

Sunny trailed behind them, dread blooming in his stomach.

Hero knocked on Basil’s door. “Basil, are you in there?” He asked.

“Where else would he be?” Kel asked.

Aubrey elbowed him again. “Basil! We’re all here for you!”

“Come out, or we’re coming in!” Kel added.

He got more of a warning than Sunny had. But he did not come out. So Hero tried the door, and as soon as it swung open, Kel and Aubrey burst in like they had Sunny’s room, Hero followed them and Sunny followed.

Basil startled at their abrupt arrival, jolting upright in such a way that Sunny wondered if he had been asleep. “Hi guys-” He began, but he froze when he made eye contact with Sunny.

Sunny stared at him, expression blank as always, not even betraying his anger.

“Hi.” Basil tried again.

“Basil! How are you?” Hero asked. “We’ve been worried, we haven’t heard from you since-”

“Mari.” Basil said quietly, looking away from Sunny. “Is she..?”

“She’s fine!” Aubrey said. “Didn’t you hear? She’s in the hospital, a couple of her bones are broken, but she’ll be okay!”

Basil wilted at the news. “I… Polly told me she was in the hospital, I wasn’t sure if…”

“We’re gonna go see her today-” Hero began.

“After we make cards for her! Do you want to come?” Kel interrupted.

“I-”

“Great!” Much like Sunny, Basil was given no choice in the matter, and Kel and Aubrey were upon him to pull him out of bed.

“Guys, be careful! Let him get ready, first.” Hero intervened.

“Yes, please!” Basil added, weakly fending off his friends.

“Don’t take too long,” Aubrey said. “Or else.”

“Or… Or else what?”

“I’ll get you!” Kel exclaimed.

“Ah… I definitely don’t want that.” Basil said with a small laugh. “I won’t be long, don’t worry! I’m.. I’m excited to see Mari!”

"We’ll wait in the living room.” Hero said, and he waited in the doorway for everyone to leave, Sunny being the last to file out.

“Sunny, wait-” Basil began.

But Sunny ignored him.

* * *

With Basil in tow, the group set off once more, this time they were headed back to their treehouse. Most of their crafting supplies had ended up there over the years so it was the ideal place for today's project.

Basil ended up walking next to Sunny at the back of the group. He fidgeted nervously and kept trying to make conversation, but Sunny refused to even look at him.

The longer they walked and the longer Sunny ignored Basil, Basil became more and more fidgety. Sunny felt… bad, about it. The tension between them was palpable, but all he could think about when he looked at Basil was how Basil just left him when he and Mari needed help, and he couldn't understand why he would just do that! Basil said he would help, but he didn't want to help Mari, he wanted to, to hide her-

Sunny walked a little faster to get away from Basil, inserting himself between Aubrey and Kel. 

Hero laughed when he noticed. “Tired of their arguing too, huh?” He asked.

Sunny stared back.

Kel and Aubrey started to argue about how they were  _ not _ arguing.

When they all reached the treehouse and clambered inside, Sunny chose a spot at the table away from Basil. Basil looked  _ hurt _ , but was quick to hide his expression as Hero and Aubrey began to lay crafting supplies on the table and encouraged everyone to get to work.

Sunny took a sheet of purple construction paper, Mari's favourite color, and a pencil, and stared at it blankly. What was he supposed to write? “Sorry for shoving you down the stairs”? No.

“Hey Aubrey.” Kel said. “Aubrey, Aubrey, Aubrey, A-”

“WHAT!” Aubrey yelled.

Kel looked at her smugly. “I bet my card will be better than yours.”

“No!  _ My  _ card will be better.” Aubrey argued. “It will be the first one Mari reads!”

“Mine's gonna be better than yours.” Kel replied. “Here! When we're done, Sunny can judge them! He'll know which Mari will like better.”

“Fine!”

“Guys,” Hero interjected. “Mari will love  _ everyone's _ cards. It isn't a competition.”

“Yes it is.” Kel muttered.

Hero sighed.

“Whatcha making, Basil?” Aubrey asked, changing the subject as she leaned over to look at his card.

“Ah. I'm trying to draw some flowers… It's not going very well.” Basil answered, frowning at his work.

Kel leaned over to look, too. “You're doing better than Sunny. He hasn't even started yet.”

Sunny blinked at the sound of his name and looked up, once again making eye contact with Basil. He looked away and at his blank paper. He hadn't even folded it yet.

Carefully, he matched the corners and creased the center until he had an even fold, but still he didn't know what to write. “Get well soon” seemed too impersonal, but anything else… Was too much.

Mari wouldn't even want a card from him, not after what he had done to her. She had to hate him now! Hate him for what he did, he deserved it. Even gentle Mari had to have  _ some _ hatred in her heart.

He began to sketch something on the inside of the card, an idle doodle more than anything, just so he would look busy to his friends, but soon he realized he was drawing a violin, and scribbled it out.

No point in reminding Mari of what he had done.

“Is everything okay, Sunny?” Hero asked, having noticed Sunny's erratic movements.

Sunny stared at him for a moment, then scribbled  _ No ideas  _ on the corner of his card and showed it to Hero.

Hero nodded in understanding. “Don't worry, I'm sure Mari will love a card from you, no matter what you write or draw.” Without Sunny asking, he reached over and got him a new piece of paper. This sheet was yellow.

“What's wrong?” Kel asked.

Hero conveyed Sunny's message; Kel nodded and said to Sunny, “you could always write “get well soon”! That's what I did.”

“Add glitter.” Aubrey said, doing just that to her own card. “Ah..! But not that much.” She frowned in frustration at her card and the small pile of glitter she had accidentally dumped on it. 

Kel laughed at her as she got up to shake some of it off into the trash, card carried carefully so as to not shed glitter on the floor. Aubrey made a face at him as she passed by.

“You… could draw some flowers, like I'm doing.” Basil suggested tentatively.

Sunny shrugged, which was about as much acknowledgement as Basil was going to get from him, and he went back to work, this time trying to draw a flower, although he couldn’t think of any off the top of his head, and refused to ask Basil for help. He settled for basic, nonspecific flowers, and a little cat napping amidst them. Mari would like that, he hoped.

Predictably, Kel finished his card first and he slapped it down on the table in front of Sunny, startling him. He had been focused on his drawing, obsessively adding details to it as if drawing a  _ really _ nice picture for Mari would make her forgive him.

“WHAT do you think?” Kel asked. “Will Mari like it?”

Kel's card was orange construction paper with “get well soon!” written in uneven block letters on the inside, and covered in artfully placed stickers as well as messily drawn doodles of things Sunny couldn't quite identify. He was pretty sure at least one of them was a dog, maybe Hector? It was hard to tell.

“I'm done too!” Aubrey announced, kindly sliding her card over to Sunny.

Her card was on pink construction paper, she had drawn a rainbow and some clouds on the front and embellished the rainbow with glitter (the leftovers of the extra glitter sparkled in one concentrated area and shed on Sunny's hands), and the inside was a similar design with a nice little message written in messy cursive.

They were both great, both capturing the character of their makers very well. Sunny was sure Mari would love them both. As his judgement, Sunny placed a hand on each card in front of him.

“Aw come on! You gotta pick one! You gotta pick mine, it's  _ clearly _ better.” Kel said.

Aubrey made a face at him. “Don't pander to the judge!”

“I'm not pandering! I didn't even draw any pandas!”

“That's not what pandering is, dummy.”

“Would you like to see my card too, Sunny?” Basil asked shyly.

_ No _ , Sunny thought bitterly.

“Yes!” Aubrey answered for him. “Show us!”

Basil slid his card across the table. It was mint green construction paper with various flowers drawn in purple ink on the bottom half, with a couple butterflies drawn above them to fill the space. Sunny was sure that the inside was drawn to match, maybe with a message in Basil's neat handwriting, but he didn't look. Basil, Sunny thought, did not deserve to give Mari a card when he had been willing to leave her to die.

He looked at Hero, as if to ask what his card looked like while ignoring how Basil wilted further, unaffected by Kel and Aubrey's praise.

“Uh, mine?” Hero asked, noticing Sunny staring. He had been writing something on the inside of the card, chewing his lower lip thoughtfully, and now as Sunny stared at him he slowly, nonchalantly even, folded his card. “I guess you can see it, just- just don’t open it, okay?”

Sunny nodded. Hero handed his card over.

Hero’s card was made of beige construction paper, and on the front he had written “get well soon” in pretty looping letters, and added some music note stickers to fill the empty space. As promised, Sunny did not open the card and would leave whatever Hero had been writing between him and Mari, even going as far as to hand the card back to Hero before Kel could get his hands on it.

“It’s pretty!” Aubrey said to Hero, looking over Sunny’s shoulder. “What about your card, Sunny?”

Sunny’s card was yellow construction paper, on which he had drawn a simple field of flowers, maybe daisies but they weren’t specific. The flowers continued on the inside of the card, and among them he had drawn a cat resembling Mari’s cat, Mewo, napping. He had not written any words. Everything he wanted to write was an apology, but Mari deserved to  _ hear _ it from him. If he could ever find the words.

“Suppose you're quiet even in writing, huh?” Kel teased. “It’s a good card! But I think Mari will like mine best.”

“What flowers are those?” Basil asked, tilting his head.

Sunny shrugged.

Hero glanced out the window. “It’s getting late, we better head down to the hospital before visiting hours end.”

* * *

Sunny’s mom drove them all to the hospital, and Sunny spent the entire car ride staring listlessly out of the window, dread growing every minute they grew closer to their destination. To Mari. She was sure to be awake this time, and Sunny was certain that the joy of seeing her friends would not outweigh her  _ hatred _ for him. She had to hate him. It simply wouldn’t make sense if she didn’t. After what he had done, he  _ deserved _ it.

The trees passing by the window seemed endless. Whatever conversation his friends were having began to blend in with the music on the radio. His vision began to blur with the scenery and his thoughts wandered until they too became blurry and blended with the radio.

He only noticed they stopped when Aubrey shouldered him while unbuckling. Carefully clutching his card in one hand, Sunny followed his friends out of the car.

The receptionist was hesitant to allow a pack of children into the hospital, but Hero did most of the talking and the rest of them showed her the cards they had made for Mari, and soon they were all signing in and heading down the familiar hallway to get to Mari’s room.

As they walked, Sunny grabbed Kel’s free hand with his own, determined to not get lost this time. Kel gave him a confused look, but gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Must be hard seeing your sister in the hospital, huh?” Kel asked, brow furrowed.

_ Especially because I put her here. _ Sunny thought.

Kel shuddered. “Dunno what I'd do if Hero got hurt like this… I don’t want to think about it.”

Sunny did not think Kel would ever need to think about it. Kel would never hurt Hero.

Hero was the first to open Mari’s door, but Aubrey rushed past him into the room with a barely contained cry of excitement, like she was  _ trying _ to be respectful of the other patients, but failing miserably. Everyone followed after her with their own happy greetings, and Sunny could hear Mari’s cheerful replies, but he lingered just outside and just out of sight, hesitant to see her.

Even  _ Basil _ entered the room before him.

“Sunny, come on!” Kel called.

He was almost certain that, under Aubrey explaining her card, he heard Mari ask, “Sunny is here too?”

Sunny was not wanted here. He knew that. It would be better for him, for Mari, and for  _ everyone _ if he left, and left them to talk and be happy. Anxiety crawled up his throat and dried out his mouth and he had to be careful to not clench his fist around his card lest he wrinkle it. He took a deep breath that did nothing to steady his pounding heart, and stepped into the room.

Mari greeted him with a smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a Kel/Aubrey fic now. I just think they're neat.
> 
> UHH this chapter is one of my favourites just because of Kel & Aubrey actually, they're a lot of fun to write. Also I really like writing the descriptions of the cards; I have a very specific picture in mind for each of them and I hope my descriptions get that across.
> 
> Once Again, thanks to [Poland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for betaing this! It would not be here without her, probably.
> 
> Thank you all for reading <3 if you enjoyed, please leave a comment!


	4. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basil had been looking forward to the recital ever since it was announced.  
> -  
> Mari loved her family, and her little brother, more than anything in the world.

_ Basil had been looking forward to the recital ever since it was announced. _

_ Everyone had been. _

_ Mari and Sunny were an amazing pair; as close as siblings could possibly be with a friendship that made him jealous. Sunny had even picked up the violin just to spend more time with her while she practiced on the piano. They sounded lovely together. Sometimes they let their friends sit in on their rehearsals, and the music they made was beautiful. _

_ Basil was jealous. _

_ Only a little bit. Because the violin meant he didn't get to see Sunny as often as usual. _

_ But it was fine. _

_ That night they were all meant to meet at Sunny's house so they could all go to the recital together; they did everything together, after all, why should this have been any different? Basil arrived early, though, because he was very excited, and because he wanted to spend a little extra time with Sunny and Mari and maybe even catch their last minute rehearsal. _

_ Instead, he arrived just in time to watch Sunny shove Mari down the stairs. _

_ Basil had heard the argument, of course. Mari was yelling and even Sunny was being louder than usual. Mari called Sunny ungrateful, Sunny called her controlling. Basil opened the door with a greeting prepared but it died on his lips as he watched Mari fall. _

_ There was nothing graceful about the way she fell. She twisted desperately like a cat trying to land on her feet, but she must have hit her head on a step because she went limp the rest of the way down until she landed in a heap on the floor. On top of Sunny's broken violin. _

_ Sunny stood at the top of the staircase, arms still extended and an expression of horror clear across his face. Behind him, a strange shadow fled. _

_ Basil screamed. _

_ He heard Sunny talking, repeating Mari's name but ignored him and knelt at Mari's side, calling her name as if that would wake her. But she didn't move. _

_ She looked dead. _

_ But… Basil knew Sunny. Basil knew that Sunny would never,  _ **_ever_ ** _ hurt Mari. It could not have been Sunny who pushed her. That thing behind him, that shadow.. That was the culprit, right? _

_ He tried to convince Sunny that they had to do something, but Sunny wouldn't listen. Sunny insisted that they should call for help, he couldn't see that Mari was beyond saving. He couldn't accept it. _

_ Basil didn't want to accept it, didn't want Mari to be dead, didn't want Sunny to be her killer. Sunny would get in trouble, he would go to jail- Basil was his friend, he couldn't let anything happen to Sunny. But Sunny wouldn't listen. _

_ Like a coward, Basil fled. _

_ He had no destination or goal in mind but he wanted to help Sunny,  _ **_had_ ** _ to help Sunny. So he wracked his brain for any ideas. _

_ What if Sunny hadn't killed Mari? _

_ What if Mari… Killed herself? _

_ By the time Basil arrived back at Sunny's house, running at full tilt with a jump rope clutched tightly in one hand, an ambulance was parked out front. _

_ He stopped. He could see people, Sunny's dad, and a stranger talking on the front step. He did not see Sunny. _

_ Swallowing his fear, Basil ran all the way back home. _

* * *

_ Mari loved her family, and her little brother, more than anything in the world. _

_ She would always remember the day Sunny had been born. She had been staying with Hero's family while her parents were in the hospital, but when they got the call they all piled into the car to take Mari to meet her new baby brother. She remembered walking into the hospital room with her dad's hands on her shoulders and seeing her mom cradling Sunny to her chest and smiling warmly. _

_ Hero's own little brother had been born several months prior to Sunny, and Mari liked playing with him, but nothing beat having her own little brother to look after. He was just like a baby doll, but a little more fragile. _

_ To the amazement of Hero's parents, Sunny was a quiet baby. Sure, he cried, but it only ever seemed to be when he needed something. Otherwise he was pretty content to sit and look around the world with his big dark eyes. Mari loved carrying him around the house and explaining things to him because it was like he was actually paying attention. _

_ When Kel started talking, he took to it like he would never be quiet again, babbling aimlessly about anything and everything even before he knew any words. When Sunny started talking, he learned “Mommy”, “Daddy”, and “Mawi” and that was all he cared to know. He'd say a name to get attention, and then use the baby sign language they had taught him to ask for whatever he wanted. He would sign “eat” or “all done”, or “I love you” to everyone, but especially his parents, and Mari. _

_ His lack of speech worried their parents, but when they took him to a doctor she said he was fine, and would learn to talk in his own time. While they waited, Mari began to get books about sign language from the library and learned alongside Sunny so that they'd always be able to talk, even without words. _

_ (She made Hero and Kel learn, too. Just in case.) _

_ Sunny did begin to talk more at home, and was positively chatty when he wanted to be, but he clammed up when he started school, refusing to speak to even his teachers. He also became prone to meltdowns. Mari would meet with him after school only to see that he had been crying, and he would hug her and bury his face in her shoulder and she would carry him home. Selective mutism, the doctor said, caused by anxiety. He'll grow out of it. _

_ He never did. But that was okay. _

_ Their friend group grew quickly. Kel met a little girl named Aubrey who was quickly accepted into the fold, and Sunny latched on to a boy named Basil who he met at school. Basil was the first friend Sunny had made at school by himself, and Mari was proud of him for that. Aubrey and Basil were quick to pick up on sign language so that they too could talk to Sunny when he didn't feel like speaking, and Hero and Mari became responsible for the four of them. _

_ For a brief time in middle school, Sunny picked up the violin when Mari began playing the piano. He took to it beautifully, and always looked very peaceful when he played, but he was quick to abandon it in favour of being able to spend more time with his friends. Mari understood. Her rehearsals drew her away from them, too, but the piano was a more social instrument and when they caught her practicing she'd always invite them to join in. _

_ Kel preferred to bash on the keys, but Hero, Aubrey, and even Basil learned at least the scales. _

_ Mari knew Sunny missed the violin. He never said anything, but she would catch him flipping through old sheet music, or trying to play the violin he had outgrown, and that's when she had the idea. _

_ It took months of hard work from all of them, but together the group bought Sunny a violin. _

_ He loved it, or so they all thought. _

_ The night of their recital, the recital that they had been rehearsing for together for months, the recital that  _ **_everyone_ ** _ had been excited for, Sunny broke the violin. _

_ She had never been so angry at Sunny before, and even as his eyes welled with tears she yelled at him, called him an ungrateful brat. _

_ He called her controlling and bossy. _

_ Maybe she should have noticed his frustration sooner. _

_ Maybe she shouldn't have been so hard on him. _

_ Or maybe Sunny should have told her he was upset. _

_ Maybe he should have said he didn't want the violin in the first place. _

_ There were too many maybes. Too many things they both could and should have done. _

_ But instead of doing any of it, they let their stresses get the better of them. Mari yelled. And Sunny shoved her down the stairs. _

_ The last memory she had of that night was of Sunny's face, rage warping into horror as he watched her fall, his arms held out still, frozen in place. _

_ When she woke up in the hospital hours later, her parents leaning over her with worry etched into their faces; she didn't know what Sunny had told them, and she didn't know if she would ever be able to forgive him. _

_ But she did know she had to protect him, just like she always did. _

_ And Mari lied. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Oh we've come to intermission, so it's time to stretch your toes...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN1XXEXLp0I)
> 
> Hi everyone, welcome to ~the interlude~, this is just a little break between chapters to give a wee bit of insight into the thoughts of others... It was pretty fun to write! I liked writing Mari's part, because I had to find a balance between giving a little backstory and like. not giving her Entire Life Story. I think I did pretty well!
> 
> Anyway, I have got to come up with new ways to thank [Poland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for all her help; once again this chapter is brought to you by her beta reading, and the Basil section was like, entirely her idea.
> 
> Thank you all for reading! Please consider leaving a comment if you enjoyed <3 I love hearing from you guys!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari comes home, Sunny and Mari have a much needed talk, and cake is had for breakfast.

The next few days passed in a fog.

Sunny tried so hard to be normal. But his head no longer belonged to him, and his hands belonged to a monster. He had always been quiet, but his friends were quick to take notice that he was no longer speaking at  **all** . “He misses Mari,” his parents said, because they all knew that she was the person he’d talk to the most. “He’ll cheer up when she’s back.”

They were wrong.

He continued trying to be normal. He hung out with his friends. He did whatever they wanted. And he tried to ignore the gaping hole that Mari had left behind.

Anywhere they went, he could picture her with them; gently scolding Kel and Aubrey for arguing, teasing Hero for getting spooked by a bug, holding Sunny’s hand when he started to get overwhelmed, talking to Basil about flowers… Everywhere they went was empty without Mari.

And it was all his fault. He was the reason she was stuck in the hospital, in the stark white hell of noise and loneliness. She had to hate it there. He hadn’t been to visit her since delivering the cards with his friends, it was too much, and even though he  _ knew _ Mari must have been suffering more for having to stay there, he just couldn’t force himself to go with his parents to visit her whenever they asked.

But Mari was coming home today, and he would no longer be able to avoid her.

His dad had already left to pick her up from the hospital, while his mom stayed home with him to prepare the house. Mari was mobile, but she would need a lot of help getting around for a while. Sunny was sure his parents would depend on him to help her, but he had no intention of doing so; not because he didn’t want to or didn’t like Mari (he wanted to help her badly, he  _ wanted _ to help her), but because he was terrified that he might hurt her once again.

She had, apparently, said she was fine to sleep in her own bedroom on the second floor despite their parents’s worries about her and the staircase. He had heard his mom fussing about it to his dad the previous night. What if Mari fell again? What if she had some stair related trauma? What if-

No, Mari would be fine. As long as Sunny wasn’t around her.

To ensure that he wouldn’t endanger Mari, Sunny had removed himself from the second floor entirely and withdrew to the playroom. Once again nesting on blankets next to the toy chest where he had hidden the violin. Violin music still played. Louder today than ever before, creating measures from his guilt.

Mari had lied about the circumstances of her fall, unknowingly supporting the false story Sunny had told. He had learned that when he visited her with his friends, and she repeated what she must have told everyone who asked, that she had tripped and fell and it was nothing more than that. Even now, Mari was defending him like she always did.

He didn’t deserve it. He didn’t understand why she wouldn’t tell the truth. He didn’t understand why she wasn’t angry, why she had smiled when she saw him, treated him like normal. He didn’t visit her again because he didn’t understand her and he was  _ sure _ she was only doing it to make him feel more guilty, so that he would tell the truth on his own.

“Sunny!” His mom called. “Mari is home!”

* * *

Sunny went out to greet Mari, who met him with a “hello” and a sad sort of smile, like she was trying to be friendly but just couldn't do it. He did not blame her, and was quick to retreat to the playroom once more, just to stay out of her way while she got settled in. She deserved the peace of mind that his lack of presence was sure to afford her.

In the playroom, he sat against the door and listened to his parents fuss over Mari, and listened to her reassure them that she was fine, that she could make it up the stairs herself, and,  _ oh! Hello Mewo! _

Mewo must have come out of her hidey-hole to greet Mari. The cat was giving Sunny’s sister a warmer greeting than he had.

Sunny sighed, shook his head, and slowly got to his feet. He wandered the small room to collect some toys to play with, easily recognizing which belong to Kel or Aubrey or Basil and had been left at his house, forgotten. He wondered briefly if his friends would want their toys back, or if they were all too old for dolls and matchbox cars.

He arranged all the toys in two lines, while one stood apart, giving instructions on how to play hide and seek. Sunny was “it”, somehow, but to humor himself he closed his eyes to count…

... _ When he opened them, he was on a playground in a pastel forest. Omori looked around. All of his friends were hiding, and he had to find them; but before he did that he wanted to go visit Mari who sat on a picnic blanket off to the side, propped up on her two healthy arms to watch the playground, and Sunny, with an amused expression. _

_ He took a step towards her. _

_ “Psst, Omori! I’m right here.” Kel whispered from his “hiding” place behind the tether-ball pole, almost directly in front of him. “Don’t tell Berly!” _

_ Omori turned back towards him and smiled. _

_ Kel winked. “Now we can go find all of our friends together!” _

_ His friends knew how much he hated to be alone, Kel must have thrown the game just to make sure he would be okay. That meant a lot, because Omori knew how much Kel loved to win games. Hand in hand with Kel, he went a-hunting for his friends. _

_ Aubrey was hiding in some bushes, Van behind some trees, and Hero had ended up exercising with Shawn and Ren instead of hiding. It took some time, but with Mari’s help, Sunny found everyone. _

_ Except Basil. _

_ They lined up for a roll call and only then was Basil’s disappearance noticed. Everyone began to look for him, only to learn that he had been grabbed by Boss! Boss had been banned from the playground because of what he did  _ **_last time_ ** _ , and now he was back to ruin their fun! _

_ Omori and his friends prepared to fight… _

_...And were successful! _

_ Basil was freed, but being himself he was quick to forgive Boss, and even lifted the ban despite everyone else’s mixed feelings, but Boss resigned himself to hiding behind a tree and everyone was quick to get back to their own games. _

_ “Okay! Can we go to my house, now?” Basil asked the group. “I still want to show you guys those sprouts I planted!” _

_ “YEAH! Let’s go!” Kel exclaimed. _

_ “Lead the way, Omori!” Hero said. _

_ Omori began to walk… _

“Sunny? Are you in there?” Sunny's mom knocked on the door. “It's time for dinner!”

Sunny, feeling slightly dazed, opened his eyes and slowly got to his feet to amble over to the door. When he opened it, his mom smiled. 

“What are you doing in there? Don’t you want to spend time with Mari?” She asked.

He shrugged slightly. 

His mom’s smile faded slightly, but she didn’t push the subject. “Come on, let’s go eat.”

* * *

Words could not begin to describe dinner that night. Awkward could not cover the emotions Sunny felt as he sat across from Mari.

Their parents chatted idly, telling Mari how happy they were that she was back and healthy, that they were  _ sure _ Sunny was thrilled to have her back, and that they had asked everyone to stay away just for the day to give Mari time to adjust, but the gang would come by tomorrow to say hello.

Mari responded to them easily, but she stared at Sunny the entire time. He did not return her gaze and couldn’t bear to look at her with her casts and her bandages and her bruises, so he stared at his plate and picked at his food and tried to ignore the weight of Mari’s attention.

He barely ate, and when dinner was over he ended up putting shrink wrap over his plate to save it for later- at his mom’s instruction. She was worried about him, he could tell, but she didn’t seem to know how to broach the subject.

“Honey? Can you help me with the dishes?”

Sunny nodded and went to join her in the kitchen. He got a clean hand towel from the linen drawer, and as his mom washed dishes and began to talk about nothing in particular, he began to zone out, thinking about his friends at Basil’s house…

_ Omori led the way to Basil’s house, past all of his gardens, past all of the emotional sprout moles, and even through a battle with Ye Olde Sproutmole. Hero taught them all about emotions and teamwork, and Kel impatiently demanded that they continue on. _

_ Basil’s house was a shoe on an island in the middle of a very small lake, surrounded by plants, as cute and as charming as Basil himself. _

_ As they were walking up the path, Basil ran ahead to take a picture of them all. He was always taking pictures, especially when people weren't paying attention; he said he liked to capture their natural selves. Everyone crowded around to see, and the picture was cute! Albeit a bit blurry, but Basil said that that just gave it character and went to put it in his photo album anyway. _

_ Kel and Aubrey started to argue then, pushing each other back and forth until they accidentally knocked Basil over, despite Hero's best efforts to stop them. Basil dropped his photo album and pictures scattered everywhere, but Hero helped him pick them all up, and Kel and Aubrey apologized. Basil said it was okay, and that they could all go inside and put the pictures back in the photo album together inside. So they did! _

_ Omori did most of the work, but he didn't mind, because he loved helping his friends and could remember which pictures went where. Basil picked up the photo album when Omori was finished and thanked him sincerely, but a picture fell out. _

_ “Oh that's odd.” said Basil as he went to pick it up. “Did one come loose?” _

_ Everyone watched him quietly, as confused as he was. He looked at the picture, head tilted slightly. _

_ “Did I take this?” Basil continued, talking more to himself than anyone else. “No, that can't be right… Mari, she's-” _

**_A crash, a shriek, Mari on the ground-_ **

A crash. Pain.

Sunny dropped the plate he was drying onto his feet.

“Oh, Sunny! Are you okay?” His mom shut the sink off abruptly and turned to him, face full of concern. “Don’t worry, honey! Accidents happen. Stay there and I’ll clean up the glass, all right?”

Accidents happen. It was fine. He didn’t  _ mean _ to drop the plate, just like he hadn’t meant to push Mari down the stairs. It was an accident!

He began to cry.

* * *

Mari and Sunny’s parents came to tuck them in that night even though they were both too old for that now. Besides, he knew that they were only there to fuss over Mari and make sure that she was okay; he was more of an afterthought, but that was okay because Mari did deserve all of the attention and it was better if he got used to this kind of treatment, anyway, because if the truth ever got out, then…

Well, this would be the rest of his life.

The lights went out and their parents left after a final goodnight, reminiscent of a better time when Sunny and Mari had been younger and their dad would read them bedtimes stories. Almost every night, after their dad left the room, Sunny would crawl into Mari’s bed to sleep with her; now, though, he stayed in his own bed and stared at the dark ceiling with empty eyes, listening to Mari as she shifted around as though trying to get comfortable.

Laying there in the dark and listening to Mari’s now even breathing slowly became unbearable. Shadows seemed to close in on him and made it hard to breathe, his sheets felt too heavy and he was too hot, his heartbeat was speeding up-

Sunny sat up abruptly. He couldn’t do it. It was all too much. Laying here and waiting for Mari to say something,  _ anything _ , while the darkness closed in on him; he couldn’t take it. As quickly, but quietly as possible he got out of bed and made towards the door with the intent to return to his nest in the playroom, but-

“Sunny?” Mari asked softly. “Where are you going?” She sounded concerned. Why would she be concerned for  _ him _ ?

He froze like a deer in the headlights, one hand already on the doorknob. He was so close to freedom that he was contemplating ignoring Mari entirely, opening the door, and making a run for it. The darkness in the playroom was oppressive but at least he was alone there, where he couldn’t hurt anyone and didn’t have to wait to be acknowledged. But wasn’t this what he had been waiting for? For Mari to talk to him?

Slowly he turned around to face her.

Through the dark, he could make out Mari’s silhouette sitting up in her bed. He couldn’t make out her face, but he imagined her expression matched her tone. Concerned.

Mari sighed wearily. “Please, Sunny, stay. We... We should talk.”

_ No _ , Sunny thought.

“Can.. can you get the light?”

He swallowed nervously, but complied.

After blinking away the sudden brightness, he looked at Mari again. She was still sitting up, her broken arm cradled across her chest and her good hand on the sheets in front of her. He had been right about her expression, she looked concerned, but she tried to offer him what he guessed was an encouraging smile as she patted her lap. An invitation.

Sunny wanted nothing more than to curl up in her lap and let her stroke his hair while she told him everything was all right, but he knew that that wouldn’t happen and he didn’t deserve her comfort, so he slunk over to her bed and perched on the very end of it, keeping his hands folded in his lap and his fingers curled into fists with his nails digging into his palms.

Mari looked troubled, and reached out to him with her good hand as if offering it for him to hold, but he did not reach out to take it. She probably wanted him to apologize.  _ He _ wanted to apologize, but “I’m sorry” simply didn’t seem like it would be enough.

“Sunny…” Mari said, and panic rose higher in his throat.

He opened his mouth to at least  _ try _ and say something-

“I forgive you.” Mari blurted.

Only to be interrupted.

His mouth snapped shut. What? No. She wasn't supposed to say that, not at all. She was supposed to yell at him, or threaten to expose the truth, or say she hated him, or at  _ least _ wait for him to attempt to apologize. He dug his fingernails harder into his palms, hoping that the pain would wake him from whatever dream he was having, but the slight stinging pain only proved that he was very much awake, so he could only stare at Mari with shock and confusion.

Mari sighed and gripped the blanket with her good hand. “No, really, I do.” She said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince him. “I… I never should have yelled at you like that, or taken my anger out on you… You shouldn’t have broken the violin and you should have told me if you were upset but… I know you’re sorry for that, right? And for… You know.”

Sunny nodded once. Slow and hesitant..

She continued to talk. “You’re my baby brother, Sunny. I… I’ve always promised to protect you and I’m not going back on that now. What you did was an accident, right? I know you, I  _ know _ you’re sorry for it. So I forgive you. You don’t need to be scared, I know why you lied and I’m not going to tell anyone the truth, and I’m not mad at you, so you don’t need to hide from me any more. It’s okay.”

It wasn’t okay.

Nothing Mari said sounded genuine to him. Maybe it was all in his head but it sounded rehearsed. She didn’t really forgive him, and that was okay! He didn’t want her to, especially because he hadn’t even properly apologized to her. He didn’t  _ deserve _ her forgiveness after what he had done to her, and now as she sat here in her casts and bandages and bruises and  _ forgave _ him he only felt more guilty.

She was  _ Mari _ . His beloved older sister. Who had pushed him too hard during their music lessons, who hadn’t noticed how stressed he was, who yelled at him, who-

Who he had pushed down the stairs.

“Sunny, please… Say something. It’s me, you know you can talk to me.” Mari offered him her good hand again.

_ Why? _ He wanted to ask, staring at her offered hand.  _ Why would you forgive me? _ He didn’t deserve her forgiveness or her protection. She shouldn’t have lied for him and he shouldn’t have lied in the first place. She said it was okay, that no one would need to know but he couldn’t believe her because she wasn’t supposed to forgive him.

He couldn’t take it. He had to get out of there.

Slowly and without a word, which would be normal for him usually but now felt rude, he got to his feet and walked away; turning the light off before he left the room and feeling Mari’s eyes on him the entire time. As soon as he closed the door behind him he slumped against it, his heart was racing and his palms stung and he felt like he had escaped an interrogation instead of a conversation with his beloved big sister.

As soon as his eyes adjusted to the dark, Sunny got himself together long enough to carefully and quietly creep down the stairs and into the playroom before finally breaking down into tears.

* * *

**Knockknockknockknock**

_...Omori was with his friends, but Basil was missing. They were all looking for him... _

**Knockknockknock**

_...The forest was a confusing maze, but with his friends behind him, Omori could do anything… _

“Sunny! Are you in there?” Kel’s voice came in through the door, loud and energetic and enough to drag Sunny from his dream.

He would have to find Basil later.

“Kel! Don’t be so loud.” Aubrey scolded, then added in a voice only slightly quieter than Kel’s, “Sunny! Come out or Kel’s gonna eat all the cake!”

_ That’s fine _ . Sunny thought groggily, blinking sleep out of his eyes. He didn’t even know what cake she was referring to.  _ Go away. Go on without me _ .

They were probably here just to see Mari, anyway. He didn’t need to be there to ruin Mari’s reunion with her friends. But unfortunately, Kel and Aubrey weren’t the type to give up.

“I’m gonna break in there if you don’t open up!” Kel threatened.

Aubrey gasped. “No you will not! Don’t damage the house, Kel! We don’t even know if he’s in there!”

“Where else could he be?”

“Outside, maybe?”

“Why would he go outside? Mari said he disappeared last night, you know he hates the dark!”

Before his friends could go on a wild goose chase, or even got too worried about him (why would they worry about him?), Sunny opened the door, rubbing one of his eyes sleepily.

“Told you!” Kel exclaimed, sticking his tongue out at Aubrey.

Aubrey made a face at him and turned back to Sunny. “Why did you sleep in there?” She asked.

Sunny did not feel like explaining. Nor could he even if he wanted to. He stared at her blankly until she frowned and shrugged, knowing that asking him more questions was pointless.

Kel grabbed Sunny’s arm. “Well, come on! Everyone’s waiting in the kitchen.” He started to pull him along, and Sunny went, if only because he had no choice in the matter. Aubrey followed along humming merrily to herself.

Mari’s return had put everyone except for Sunny in a good mood, it seemed.

In the kitchen, Mari was sitting on one of the counters, chatting away with Hero as he cut up a cake. Basil was helping by supplying Hero with plates, and occasionally interjecting his own comments into the conversation. Mari paused mid-sentence when she and Sunny made eye contact, but was quick to look away and continue talking.

“We’re having cake for breakfast!” Kel announced to Sunny, gesturing grandly at Hero and the cake. “It’s strawberry, and he stayed up  _ all night _ making it for Mari.”

“Hero! Is that true?” Mari asked.

“N.. No, Kel is exaggerating.” Hero said ducking his head to hide his blush.

“He better be! You know it’s not healthy to stay up all night.”

“I am, Mari! Don’t worry.” Kel laughed. “He did stay up pretty late though.”

“ _ Kel _ .” Hero complained.

Aubrey had an odd look on her face, knowing and excited. “Staying up all night to make a cake for  _ Mari _ , huh?” She asked Hero, grinning.

“Sunny!” Basil cut in, perhaps to save Hero from being interrogated. “Why don’t you help me set the table?”

Sunny did not want to do that or be near or alone with Basil, but he couldn’t think of a  _ good _ reason to refuse, so he suppressed a sigh and went over to pick up two plates. Basil got two of his own, and they both left for the dining room.

Setting the table took very little time but in that time Basil kept sending Sunny furtive glances that he ignored. He did not want to talk and he did not want to talk to  _ Basil _ , and was the first to return to the kitchen, because at least the focus would be off of him if he were near the group.

“Guys! What do you want to drink?” Aubrey asked, standing at the fridge with a row of glasses lined up.

“Orange Joe, please!” Kel called.

“Ew, Kel! With cake?” Aubrey made a face. “That’s gross.”

“You’re gross!” Kel shot back. “You’d like it if you tried it!”

“That’s a bit too much sugar, Kel.” Hero tried to interrupt. He was ignored.

“I’d rather  _ die _ !” Aubrey responded dramatically. “Now I’m taking drink orders for anyone  _ but _ Kel!”

“Hey, that’s not fair!”

“Will you two knock it off?” Mari snapped.

Everyone froze.

Basil looked stricken, Hero was surprised, Kel had an awkward smile stuck to his face, and Aubrey’s face was crumpled, like she was going to cry. Sunny felt like he had been struck. The last time Mari had snapped like that, it had been aimed at  _ him _ , and he had… 

Mari realized her mistake immediately. “I’m so sorry, I-” 

“Let’s… Take a walk.” Hero interrupted gently, already offering her a hand to help her get off the counter. She accepted it. Everyone watched them leave.

Aubrey began to cry..

“Aw, don’t cry, Aubrey!” Kel said, his cheery voice sounding strained. “I’m sure she didn’t mean it! She’s probably just cranky ‘cause she’s hurting.” He rested a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Sunny clenched his jaw and stared at the floor. This was his fault. It was his fault that Mari was hurt and mad because of it. Basil put a hand on his arm and stepped closer without saying anything, as if he knew exactly what Sunny was thinking about.

“Y-yeah, you’re probably right.” Aubrey sniffled and wiped her face with her arm. “Mari would never actually be mad at us, right? We argue all the time and she’s never…”

“Of course not! We’re too adorable for her to be  _ really _ mad at us.” Kel still sounded strained.

“Thanks, Kel.” Aubrey said, smiling at him. “And, and, maybe Orange Joe isn’t  _ entirely _ disgusting.”

Kel grinned, this time it looked genuine. “I knew it! So do you want some?”

“Absolutely not.”

They both laughed, and even Basil giggled a little although Sunny wasn’t sure what was so funny. They were probably only laughing to relieve the tension in the air. Basil let go of Sunny’s arm and cleared his throat awkwardly.

“So… Drinks?” He asked cautiously.

“Right! For everyone except Kel!” Aubrey stood up straighter. “What do you want, Basil, Sunny?”

“Not fair!” Kel complained.

Before Basil or Sunny could respond, Mari and Hero returned to the room, Mari looking apologetic with her head bent as best as she could bend it, given the brace, and her eyes downcast.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you, Kel, Aubrey.” She said softly. “I-”

“It’s okay!” Kel interrupted, unwilling to linger on it. “We couldn’t stay upset with you, Mari.”

Aubrey sniffled, then nodded. “Would you like a drink?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy. This chapter is brought to you by a lot of screaming. So far, it is our most heavily edited chapter; the apology discussion has three different versions (including this published version, an amalgamation of its predecessors), and the breakfast bit at the end was originally cut until Poland suggested I add it back in. Overall, for me, this sure is a chapter and that's about as much as I have to say for it; but I am very excited for you guys to see the next two chapters. :)
> 
> Also, peep that chapter number; we've got a set end, boys! This'll (hopefully) be wrapped up by chapter ten! Wish me luck.
> 
> Thanks again to Polandspringz for betaing this several times over, and helping me figure all of it out. This chapter is also brought to you by her. Everyone say "thank you poland".
> 
> Thank you for reading! Please consider leaving a comment if you enjoyed! <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A birthday party.

Sunny did not come out of the playroom for several days after that. Even when his friends came to see Mari the day after she came home, and even when they came back every day since then to try and convince him to come outside and play. The only times he did leave were when his extremely worried parents talked him into emerging to eat something, or when he needed to use the bathroom. In both instances, he took care to avoid Mari.

Mari came to the door frequently to talk to him, but he never responded.

He pretended to himself that he was content in his self-imposed isolation as he listened to his friends talk in the living room on some days, and as he eavesdropped on his parents as they spoke on the stairs in hushed whispers about how worried about him that they were. More often than not, though, he was outside of his own head and playing games in the dreamworld with his friends while Mari watched on from the safety of her picnic blanket.

Besides, he had toys to play with when he was in the present, and his sketchbook with a few colored pencils. He liked to draw his dreamy adventures sometimes, and thought about showing them to his friends; he knew Aubrey would like the various bunnies that inhabited the land, and that Basil would love all the strange and interesting plants, but he also knew that he would never get to show them.

Sunny had picked up another “hobby”, too. One night, when he had been making himself dinner long after his family had gone to bed, he accidentally cut one of his fingers with a knife.

So he took the entire knife with him...

...And used it when he needed to remember that he was  _ real _ .

_ (There was no harm in a few thin, red lines, was there?) _

Today was Aubrey’s birthday. Everyone had been invited to the park for her birthday party in the evening. Sunny’s mom made him leave the room and go to Hobbeez’s with Mari that morning to go get Aubrey some birthday gifts, but Sunny remained withdrawn the entire time. Mari, too, was quiet but she kept glancing at him as if to make sure he was still with her. Sunny was too busy imagining Sprout Moles and other small creatures going about their days around him to notice.

His mom did not need to force him to go to Aubrey’s birthday party, he went willingly because he owed that much to Aubrey, although he did dread the inevitable questions about his whereabouts the past few days, and questions about why had he been avoiding them, and teasing about “oh look who's finally emerged!”

He and Mari wrapped their gifts, then ate lunch, and then he retreated to the playroom until it was time to meet the others at the park. Sunny must have dozed off though, because the next thing he knew he was woken up by someone knocking on the door.

“Sunny! Come on! We’re going to be late!” It was Mari. She sounded annoyed.

Sunny shuddered at her tone and considered his warm nest of blankets. Maybe if he laid back down and ignored her she would go away…

No.

“Sunny!”

That wouldn't do.

Slowly he got to his feet and went to the door. When he opened it, Mari scowled at him and left, giving him no choice but to follow.

* * *

Mari was right. They were late. Only by a few minutes, but they were still late. And it was all Sunny's fault.

They were spotted walking up to the park almost immediately and Kel and Aubrey came sprinting over to greet them with Basil and Hero following at a slightly slower pace.

“Hi guys!” Aubrey greeted, smiling brightly.

“Happy birthday, Aubrey!” Mari replied. “Sorry we're late.”

“I’m just glad you came at all! I mean, after the past few days, I was worried that Sunny wouldn’t come.”

“Aw, c’mon Aubrey, Sunny couldn’t possibly ignore you on your birthday!” Kel slung an arm around Sunny’s shoulders, but his cheerful voice sounded a little strained.

Sunny wordlessly held his gift out to Aubrey.

“Oh, for me? Thank you!” She accepted it with a bright smile.

“I have a gift for you, too!” Mari said, offering her own present to Aubrey.

“Thank you!” Aubrey repeated. “Come on, guys! You should see what Basil and I did for decorations! Oh, and the cake Hero made!”

“You made a cake?” Mari asked. “That’s so sweet of you.”

“It was nothing! I thought Aubrey would like it.” Hero replied, bashfully rubbing the back of his head.

“I do! It’s bunny shaped! Mari, come look!” Aubrey waved for them to follow and dashed off with Kel hot on her heels. Basil and Sunny followed at a slower pace, and Hero and Mari brought up the rear.

Basil and Aubrey had sectioned off a small portion of the park to be Aubrey’s Birthday Zone; two picnic blankets had been set up along with a collapsible table and a cooler. The decorations were minimal but all very  _ Aubrey _ , some pastel balloons and streamers had been strewn about and Basil had even thrown in some flowers made of paper. Aubrey’s mom sat on one of the picnic blankets with Kel and Hero’s mom, and their dad was grilling food. Sunny and Mari’s parents went to join the adults and, after admiring all the decorations, Sunny trailed away to join them.

Aubrey, Kel, and Basil all ran off to go play together while Hero and Mari stood nearby, though it looked like Mari was trying to encourage Hero to join them.

“Don’t you want to go play, too?” Sunny’s mom asked him.

Sunny shrugged. It was safer for everyone if he didn’t.

His mom frowned, but didn’t push the issue and instead turned away to exchange pleasantries with the other adults. Sunny listened with half an ear, but his focus was on his friends.

“I’m glad Aubrey’s having fun.” Aubrey’s mom commented to the other moms as they watched Aubrey wrestle Kel to the ground while he cackled wildly. “This is her first birthday since her dad left us… I was worried for her.”

Hero fruitlessly attempted to intervene and Basil stood by to take a picture. Mari was laughing and cheering Aubrey on.

Sunny frowned. He had forgotten about the whole situation with Aubrey’s dad, but she didn’t talk about it too much; it was a major sore spot for her, but he did remember the sleepovers that they had spent comforting her.

“She’s got a lot of friends to support her, I’m sure she’ll be okay.” Sunny’s mom said.

Aubrey was sitting on Kel’s back while he writhed and laughed. Hero had clearly given up on separating them and seemed to be bargaining with Aubrey for his brother’s freedom.

“Kids!” Kel’s dad called. “Dinner’s ready!”

Kel immediately twisted Aubrey off of his back and onto the ground, then he leapt to his feet and was about to sprint away but-

“OW! Kel!” Aubrey whined.

“Sorry!” Kel stopped and went back to help Aubrey up.

Hero laughed. “Maybe you do have manners.” He teased Kel.

“It’s her birthday! I gotta be nice.” Kel said to him, then to Aubrey he added, “But tomorrow? All bets are off.”

“Sure.” Aubrey replied.

They ate a dinner of hotdogs and hamburgers and chatted gleefully all the while. When they were done eating, Sunny was dragged off to play with his friends while Mari stayed behind this time, apologetically telling Aubrey that she was starting to ache and needed a break.

In the meantime, Sunny was brought into a game of Hide and Tag that Kel both suggested and seemed to be making up as he went, but no one really minded. Sunny was not very fast and was not doing very well in the game, Basil and Hero were both giving it their best but Basil was slow because he didn’t want to break his camera and kept landing in the “out” zone that was the sandbox with Sunny.

“Uh, come here often?” Basil asked Sunny with a nervous laugh.

Sunny stared at him.

“Yeah… Yeah, that was stupid.” Basil said. “Uh, h-how are you, Sunny? Now that Mari’s back.”

He continued to stare. Was the answer not obvious?

Basil frowned. “That was stupid too, huh?” He sighed. “Y-you haven’t spoken since… Since Mari f-fell… I’ve been worried-”

Why had he been worried? It wasn’t like he cared enough about Sunny or Mari to help either of them.

Sunny looked away.

Basil was quiet for a moment. “Do you think the others… forgot about us? We’ve been here for a while…”

He was right. Sunny hadn’t actually seen Kel or Aubrey for a few minutes now. Had they stopped the game? He stood up abruptly to go look for them, and although he didn’t look, he could hear Basil stand up to follow him.

Locating their friends, as it turned out, wasn’t particularly hard. They had apparently all returned to the picnic area to talk to Mari, and Aubrey seemed to be in the middle of convincing Mari to come and play while Kel and Hero roughhoused over… Something.

“Uh… Hi, guys,” Basil said, raising a hand in greeting.

Aubrey turned on him. “BASIL!”

Sunny took a step back as Aubrey at Basil and dragged him forward towards Mari with her, continuing to talk. Mari looked mildly annoyed with her jaw set and her furrowed.

“Can you  _ please _ help me convince Mari to come play?”

“Um-” 

“I said no, Aubrey.” Mari said firmly, sounding as if her patience was running thin. Sunny curled his trembling fingers into a fist. He didn’t like when Mari used that tone, and it was especially upsetting that she was using it with  _ Aubrey _ of all people.

But Aubrey was stubborn, and persistent, and Mari was one of her favourite people. He knew she would want Mari around on her birthday instead of sitting on the sidelines to watch.

(He had no right to be bitter that Aubrey was putting more effort into convincing Mari to play than she had put in to convincing him earlier; he understood he wasn’t wanted. It was safer that way. Or so he tried to convince himself.)

(The sinking feeling in his gut told him that it was not working.)

“Please, Mari?” Aubrey begged. “You look so lonely over here! And it  _ is _ my birthday! You don’t even have to play! Can’t you just come with us?”

“ **No** Aubrey!” Mari snapped. “Now will you leave me alone?”

Everyone went silent and stared at Mari. Kel fell from Hero with an audible “oof”. Aubrey and Basil both took a step back, with Basil grabbing for Aubrey’s hand. Sunny felt as if he had been struck, his eyes hot with sudden tears.

He wasn’t the only one crying. Aubrey pulled away from Basil and ran away without a word.

After a few more rapid heartbeats passed, Mari stood up and walked away in the opposite direction; leaving everyone to stare after her.

Kel stood up. “What the f-” 

“Kel!” Hero interrupted sharply.

“What? We were all thinking it!” Kel’s voice was defensive.

Sunny tensed and untensed his hands, desperately trying to keep himself calm in the face of Mari’s outburst. Once again, it was all his fault she was angry in the first place. Her anger was always his fault.

“Um… Should someone… Go talk to them?” Basil suggested timidly. His arms were folded across his chest and he was rubbing one of his arms as if to soothe himself.

“I’ll go talk to Aubrey!” Kel volunteered.

“No.. We should let Sunny go.” Hero said.

Why would they want  _ him _ to talk to Aubrey? He couldn’t even talk! Sunny frowned and pointed at himself.

“Why Sunny?” Kel asked, echoing Sunny’s own thoughts. Kel didn’t sound mean, but he did sound disappointed.

“He does uh, have a s-sort of, calming energy?” Basil offered. “He doesn’t say much, y’know, but… He’s calm.”

“Exactly.” Hero nodded. “And I’ll.. Go talk to Mari.” He looked in the direction she had gone, his expression thoughtful, but his brow creased with worry.

Kel frowned, looking visibly tense although not quite  _ upset _ . Basil bit his lower lip and stepped over to Kel, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll stay and talk to Kel.” He said.

“‘m fine.” Kel replied, but he didn’t shrug Basil off.

With their tasks decided, Sunny and Hero split up to find their respective charges.

* * *

Sunny found Aubrey by the lake in the back of the park. It was their secret hangout spot, a place they frequented for picnics, and swimming when the weather was warm enough. She was sitting on the dock, legs dangling over the water. Sunny sat down next to her and tried to suppress his anxiety about the proximity to the lake.

Wordlessly, Aubrey leaned into him for a hug, burying her face in his shoulder to cry. He awkwardly put an arm around her, but had no words to offer for comfort.

After what had to be a few minutes at least, Aubrey sat up and wiped her face with her arm. “Why… Why would Mari yell at me?” She asked Sunny.

He had no answer for her.

“I guess.. I was being a pest, but… She never…” Aubrey sniffled. “There was when she came back, you remember? She… She’s been different, since…”

Yeah. She had been. And it was Sunny’s fault. He looked away from Aubrey, scrunching his face up to keep from crying. He was supposed to be comforting her, not the other way around.

(Besides, he didn’t deserve comfort for what he’d done.)

“Is she… Like this when we aren’t around, too?”

Sunny hesitated, then nodded.

“Oh.”

He could practically feel Aubrey’s frown.

Aubrey leaned into him again for a moment, then she started to stand up.

“We should probably head back to the others, huh?” She said, offering Sunny a hand to help him up. He tentatively accepted, and hand in hand they walked back to the party.

Hero had already gotten Mari back, and the two of them looked to be deep in conversation. Kel and Basil notably sat a small distance away and seemed equally enthralled in their own conversation, whatever that might have been. Aubrey walked right past them and up to Mari, bringing Sunny with her as her emotional support friend. Mari and Hero both stopped talking as the two kids approached.

Aubrey began, “Mari, I-”

“I’m sorry.” Mari interrupted, and to her credit she  _ did _ look apologetic, with her eyes downcast and her head bowed as much as it could be with the neck brace in the way. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”

“I shouldn’t have been so annoying.” Aubrey said with a nonchalant shrug, though her tone was a little sad.

Sunny squeezed her hand. She smiled at him.

“Maybe not,” Mari agreed, “but that still didn’t warrant my reaction. I… Hang on. Basil, Kel, can you two come here?” Her tone raised slightly to call out to the other two, and everyone turned to look at them.

Basil and Kel exchanged a look, but both stood up and walked over anyway.

“Yeah?” Kel asked cautiously.

Mari sighed and pursed her lips as everyone turned back to look at her. Her hands were folded in her lap and she was twiddling her thumbs nervously. That in itself was weird for Mari; she was never nervous.

Finally, she spoke. “I should tell all of you… Ever since my fall it’s been.. Harder to control my temper. Apparently that’s common with this kind of head injury. But that doesn’t mean I’m not trying, I promise! It’s just going to take a little time for me to figure it all out. I promise you all though, I will try to figure it out.” Mari smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her sad eyes.

Sunny released Aubrey’s hand and shrank in on himself by hunching his shoulders and looking down at his shoes. This was his fault. Mari was struggling because of him. It wasn’t enough that he had broken her neck and her arm but he had altered her personality, too!

Why would she forgive him for this? He didn’t deserve it! He had done far too much damage for  _ anyone _ to forgive him.

The world seemed to grow larger around him, his hands shook and his heart was beating rapidly in his throat and-

Aubrey picked up his hand again.

“Aw, it’s okay Mari!” Kel exclaimed with forced cheerfulness.

Basil nodded slowly, eyeing Sunny, which Sunny ignored. “Y-yeah.” He agreed. “We’ll be sure to h-help if we can.”

Sunny wanted to glare at him.

“Of course we’ll help.” Hero added. “And we’ll be patient with you in the meantime.”

Mari’s smile this time was happier and more genuine. “Thanks guys.” She said, sounding relieved. “And, Aubrey?”

“Yeah?”

“You know how we’ve always talked about dyeing our hair together? Maybe we should actually do that sometime.”

Aubrey grinned. “Really?”

“Yeah! I mean, we’ll have to ask our parents, and do a bit of research beforehand but-”

“YES! We absolutely should!” Aubrey was practically vibrating now. “I’m gonna dye my hair PINK!”

“Gross.” Kel said, sticking his tongue out. Hero elbowed him.

“U-um. Could I… Join you guys?” Basil asked shyly.

“You want to dye your hair too?” Aubrey replied, surprised.

“K-kinda, yeah. I think it’d be fun.”

“Of course you can join, Basil!” Mari said, then she leaned over and nudged Hero with her shoulder. “You could join too, you know.”

Hero chuckled. “Thanks, but I think mom would kill me if I tried.”

“One day,” Mari joked threateningly. “One day…”

“Hey,” Kel interrupted. “Could you guys make your plans while we eat something? Like, maybe, cake?”

“I think cake is um, Aubrey’s decision.” Basil said.

“It is.” Aubrey responded. “But I also want cake. We shouldn’t let Hero’s hard work go unappreciated!”

“Cake it is, then.” Hero said, and Kel cheered. “Let’s go, everyone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When we were plotting this, the key theme was "mari ruins aubrey's birthday party". 
> 
> Half of this entire chapter was erased and rewritten because the original draft was written just to be Written. This version is a lot better. There was a lot more I wanted to write about Aubrey in this chapter, but none of it would have fit so I wasn't able to include it. Rip Aubrey, I guess. It'll come up in a later chapter. Maybe.
> 
> Thank you to [Poland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for betaing and helping me write this chapter! It would not be here without her.
> 
> Also, you guys can find me on tumblr [@cat--girls](https://cat--girls.tumblr.com/)! Feel free to send me asks or whatever <3
> 
> Thank you all for reading! Please consider leaving a comment if you enjoyed <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hair-dyeing shenanigans, and... something else.

After several days of Mari, Aubrey, and Basil begging their respective parents and guardians, and making plans and doing research, the time finally came for them all to meet at Mari’s house to dye their hair.

Sunny, of course, was tucked away in his new room. Mari had attempted to convince him to join them once, but when she received no response as was the new normal, she quickly gave up.

He didn’t want to dye his hair, but he _did_ want to see his friends. Or Aubrey, at least. Basil remained on thin ice.

But it was safer for them if he stayed here, away from them. It was safer for Mari.

“Sunny!” His mom called, knocking on the door. “I’m going out to run some errands and get something for dinner. Mari is in charge. Also, come and say hi to your friends!”

No response.

His mom sighed. “I love you, honey. Be good.”

As she walked away, Sunny crawled up to the door and sat against it with one ear pressed against the wood. He could hear Mari talking in the living room, laying out the rules of this endeavour; and he could picture Aubrey sitting on the couch, leaning forward with her hands on her knees, stars in her eyes, and a grin on her face. He could also picture Basil, sitting back on the couch fiddling with his fingers in his lap but still listening to Mari with rapt attention.

Were Hero and Kel here, too? He didn’t know, but it didn’t sound like Aubrey was arguing with anyone or like Mari was flirting, so maybe they weren’t.

Odd.

He chewed on his lower lip nervously. When did the thought of seeing his friends begin to make him feel dread? Why did he feel nervous to be around the ones that he loved? He knew it was better, _safer_ , to stay away from them, but wasn’t this the reason why he had smashed his violin in the first place? Because it was keeping him away from his friends? He ground his teeth at the irony. His reach for freedom had only resulted in more isolation.

Wasn’t it better to be alone to keep everyone safe?

“Sunny!” Someone, Aubrey this time, knocked on the door. “I know you’re in there! Come out! We’re gonna go dye our hair now, don’t you want to help?”

“Just leave him.” He heard Mari say.

“Oh, okay.” Aubrey responded sadly, but to the door she said, “we’ll be in the bathroom if you feel like coming to join us.”

He didn’t respond, and after a moment he heard Aubrey retreat and the three of them thump up the stairs; joking together as they went.

Sunny thumped his head against the door anxiously. _Idiot_ , he thought. Why was he wasting what precious time he had left with his friends? Sooner or later they would know the truth and then they would all hate him, he ought to spend as much time with them as he could before he lost them forever.

But was it worth jeopardizing them?

He stood up. And opened the door.

* * *

_...Sweetheart had fallen in love with Hero (don’t tell Mari, she’ll be jealous!) and wanted to marry him, but they couldn’t let that happen, could they? Hero wasn’t interested in Sweetheart, anyway, he was just too polite to say so to her face..._

_...That was okay, though, because Omori and all of Hero’s friends would defend him…_

_...They got sent to the dungeon for their efforts…_

_...But the cell door was unlocked…_

“Sunny?” Someone was cautiously shaking him awake.

Sunny groaned and softly and lazily batted the hand bothering him away. Did he… Fall asleep? He hadn’t meant to. Last thing he remembered, he was going to sit on the couch to wait for Mari and their friends to come back downstairs, but maybe he must have been more tired than he thought…

He yawned and slowly opened his eyes only to startle awake. Standing over him was… Basil?

Basil with mint green hair to match his eyes. Basil as he appeared in Sunny’s dreams.

Was Sunny really awake? He wished for his knife so he could do a reality check, but in lieu of that he settled for pressing a hand to the cuts already on his stomach. The stinging ache confirmed his consciousness, but he still wasn’t entirely convinced.

“What do you think?” Basil asked, self-consciously putting a hand to his still slightly damp hair. “Aubrey and Mari say it looks great, but I’m not too sure yet… Suppose I can’t change my mind anymore, though, haha…”

Sunny, still trying to get over his shock, slowly raised one hand to give Basil a thumbs up.

Basil _beamed_. “You think?” It was more acknowledgement than he had recently been getting from Sunny.

No further response. Sunny lowered his hand.

“Ah..” Basil’s mouth twisted awkwardly. “I… We weren’t expecting you t-to... Can I sit down?”

When Sunny did not make room for Basil on the couch, he sighed and sat down on the floor with his back against it.

“Mari and Aubrey should be done soon.”

Still nothing.

Silence, broken only by whatever was on the TV and the distant sound of giggling from upstairs. Basil played with his fingers on his lap and Sunny thumbed the hem of his shirt, still longing for his knife, _just to be sure_....

“Sunny? What happened to your stomach?” Basil was looking at him. How long had Basil been looking at him?

All too late Sunny realized that he had pulled his shirt too high and that Basil was staring. He was quick to yank his shirt back down, hide the evidence, a million lies forming on his tongue, _oh it’s nothing_ , he would say, _Mewo scratched me, that’s it_ , but he didn’t have the words. It didn’t matter, anyway, he was interrupted before he could do anything.

“Basil!” Aubrey came bursting into the room with Mari hot on her heels. “Oh! And Sunny! What do you guys think?” She did a little twirl.

Her hair was now an atrocious shade of hot pink that was a little patchy in some places, yet somehow she managed to pull it off. Mari’s hair was now a similarly slightly patchy deep purple that suited her.

Sunny gave them two thumbs up. A higher rating than the one Basil got.

Aubrey grinned and clapped her hands. Even Mari smiled.

“Not bad for a first try, huh?” She said, lightly elbowing Aubrey with her good arm.

“Not bad at all!” Aubrey agreed. “And Basil! You look great!”

Basil ducked his head shyly. “Th-thanks.”

“Kel and Hero are going to be so surprised.” Mari said, still smiling. “I can’t wait to see Hero’s face.”

“Yeah! I mean, Kel’s probably gonna call my hair _gross_ , but, that’s because he has no taste.” Aubrey paused. “Where are they, anyway?”

Mari shrugged. “They couldn’t come tonight, their mom wanted to have a family game night.”

“Ah.” Aubrey frowned.

“They’ll have something to l-look forward to.” Basil offered. “And your hair isn’t gross, Aubrey! It looks cute.”

“Thanks, Basil!”

Sunny sat up, curling his legs underneath him to make himself small. Unnoticeable.

“Didn’t expect you to come out, Sunny.” Mari said, her tone was light, but there was something in her expression he couldn’t read. It made him uneasy.

He shrugged in response.

“Oh, Basil! Do you have your camera? You should take a picture of us!” Aubrey gasped. “Or give it to Sunny, so you can be in the picture too!”

“Um..”

Basil gave Sunny a nervous look, as if he didn’t trust him with his camera. Sunny struggled to decide if that was fair or not; but because Aubrey insisted, Basil handed Sunny his camera, and because Aubrey insisted, Sunny accepted it and hoped that Basil wouldn't notice his shaking hands.

Aubrey and Mari struck a pose with Basil smiling sheepishly between them and Sunny prepared the camera although he hated to immortalize all of Mari's injuries (that he caused) in a photo. It'd be a reminder of his guilt whenever they went through Basil's photo album.

Sunny took the picture.

The lock on the front door began to audibly twist and they all turned to look as Sunny’s mom came inside, her hands full of groceries. She stopped when she saw all of them.

“Oh, my goodness.” She said, surprised.

“What do you think?” Aubrey asked, bouncing forward excitedly.

“It’s… Different.” Sunny’s mom told her. “But it looks nice. You all look nice. And Sunny! You actually came out?”

Sunny shrank back into the couch and regretted his decision.

His mom shrugged and went back to addressing the group as a whole, “I picked up a pizza for dinner, so go wash up and we’ll eat, okay?”

* * *

“Can we stay over tonight?” Aubrey asked Sunny’s mom over dinner.

“I don’t see why not, but are your parents okay with it?” Sunny’s mom replied.

Aubrey snorted. “My mom won’t notice.”

Sunny’s mom frowned, but didn’t comment. “Basil?”

“My parents won’t notice either.” Basil said with a shrug. “But I uh… Should probably call Polly.”

“The phone is in the hallway whenever you want to use it.” Sunny’s mom said, her frown deepening.

With permission granted and phone calls made, that night they all packed together in Sunny and Mari’s room. Normally, Aubrey would sleep with Mari and Basil would sleep with Sunny, or they’d all sleep together in a pile, but tonight Sunny silently rejected Basil, and Aubrey declined sleeping with Mari before Mari could decline her, surprising everyone.

Aubrey said it was because of Mari’s injuries, but the slight discomfort in her voice suggested something else.

Instead, Aubrey and Basil slept on an air mattress and a nest of spare blankets cozily crammed between Mari and Sunny’s beds.

Sunny laid in bed for hours, staring at the dark ceiling and listening to his friends shift around and whisper to each other. Only when he was certain that they were all asleep and had been for a while did he get out of bed and quietly slip out of the room.

His absence wouldn’t be noticed until tomorrow, and even then he wouldn’t be missed.

He was about to descend the stairs when-

“Sunny?”

Basil stood a few feet away, looking oddly ominous in the pale moonlight that filtered in from the window behind him.

“Where are you going?” Basil sounded almost scared. Shadows seemed darker around him.

Sunny took a step back.

“Why are you leaving, Sunny?” Basil asked, taking a step closer. “Why won’t you talk to me?” Desperation leaked into his voice. He took another step forward. Sunny took another step back.

“I’m sorry, Sunny, I didn’t mean- I didn’t-” Basil was shaking. The shadows seemed to darken more as he stepped out of the light and closer to Sunny. Sunny could feel his heart pounding.

“Please say something!” Basil was coming towards him a little faster now, hands clasped together as if pleading. “Please! I know it wasn’t you, Sunny! You- you would never- and I… I should’ve- but it’s okay now-”

Sunny took another step back.

And tripped.

“Sunny!”

Basil lunged and managed to grab him by the arm and pull him forward; Sunny stumbled on his feet, his free arm pinwheeling for balance, but he stayed up upright. As soon as Sunny was safe, Basil dropped his arm like a hot coal.

He had been backed against the railing. Would he really have gone over the edge? He didn’t know.

And as he stared at Basil he wondered, would Basil have done anything to help him? Or would Basil have left him to be discovered in the morning, just like he left Mari?

He didn’t know the answer to that, either.

They stared at each other, Basil looking as frightened as Sunny felt, but neither spoke. Sunny because he didn’t speak, and Basil because he didn’t know what to say.

“What’s going on?” A sleepy voice interrupted.

They both turned around to see Aubrey standing in the bedroom doorway, rubbing her eye with one hand and holding a stuffed animal with her other.

“N-nothing!” Basil lied. “We were just, uh, going to get a snack, a-and Sunny tripped a little, is all. Right, Sunny?”

He looked at Sunny for help. Sunny did nothing to confirm nor deny his story.

“Hm.” Aubrey seemed doubtful. “Whatever. Just keep it down.” Without waiting for an answer, she turned and walked back into the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

As soon as she was gone, Basil turned back to Sunny, his mouth open like he had something to say, but Sunny turned away

And

Left

Basil

Alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know absolutely nothing about hair dyeing and it shows <3 sorry everyone.
> 
> Not much to say on this chapter except that it was fun to write, most of it had to be rewritten along with six but it's all good and I really like the ending (even if I had to reformat those last few words for ao3), that's the only part that wasn't rewritten, actually.
> 
> Also, you may have notice that our Final Chapter count has gone up to twelve; that is because chapter nine got WAY out of hand and had to be split in two, and because I refused to go out on eleven chapters, I'm going to write a new chapter eight. Aside from that and ten, everything should be on schedule (even though there is no real schedule.)
> 
> Special thanks to [Poland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/polandspringz/pseuds/polandspringz) for betaing and helping me with all of this once again! Everyone say thank you Poland!
> 
> Thank you all for reading! Please consider leaving a comment if you enjoyed <3


End file.
